Raising kids isn't easy and some parents need to blow off steam. I hate when new parents ask who the baby looks like. Take your kids to visit a new place with lots of things to see so they can complain about the snacks at the hotel. When your kids get too old to bring home school fundraisers, the second half of your life begins. Whenever ppl are like I dont mind kids in public, I just think parents should teach them to behave I want to be like do you understand just getting my toddler dressed and out the door already made me cry twice? Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez @johndavids_635 Kids cough like this but you wanna open up schools???? Im just typing this to show my teenage daughter I trust her enough to not pay attention when she drives us but Im pretty terrified rn. Do you love humor and heartwarming stories? 5 min read. Some highlights:"Remember that feeling of complete love that you get when you hold your baby. So, whats for gross dinner?Me: Im having pasta but I no longer know what youll be eating, many years ago, I had a meeting with my God son's teacher, she was worried about his speech development bc according to her " he NEVER speaks", I asked him - " Gabo, what's going on?" Turn it off! Oldest child: Here are 100 pictures of me as a baby eating oatmeal. Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! Wait, you might be asking yourself, are parents really funny? It's finally March, and you know what that means? Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! Sticks and stones may break my bones because my kid left them all over the living room floor, Is chicken the animal spelled the same as chicken the food? - my child, about to be shook. Me: You can't wear that to school.10-year-old: Why not?Me: It's not nice enough.10: I've been going to school with these kids for years. Part of HuffPost Parenting. We're watching Shrek as a family and at the moment when Fiona turned from a woman into an ogre, my 2yo pointed to the TV and said "now she's a mom.". These are the moms and dads who made us laugh out loud. My 1yo is starting to get mad at this baby that keeps staring at her. Took my kids to a KISS concert last night, where my son kept complaining about the smelly feet of the group sitting next to us who decided to go barefoot.In unrelated news, my son doesn't know what weed smells like. Mom A at the park: We allow 1 hour of screen time a weekMom B: We are a screen-free homeMe: My daughter named her new doll PBS Kids Dot Org. Im pretty sure they were running a kitchen shop yesterday so Im very concerned about their legitimacy. My 9YO is half way done sharing her dream which she started narrating last Monday. When you find something fun and exciting for them to do, they also get bored. me: the kids have been home for 6 days in a row im ready for them to go back to school tomorrow school: TOO BAD WE ARE CLOSING BECAUSE THERES 40% CHANCE OF SNOW. 5 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. me: I had my first crush on a girl when I was in the first grade. Yay, summer! Birds are chirping. It was so cute that he thought it was for him. You can have kids or you can have a complete set of silverware. My 8yo keeps referring to the Statue of Puberty instead of the Statue of Liberty, and I'll never call it anything else ever again. Part of HuffPost Parenting. Wait, why are they jumping? 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. 5 year old: can you breathe on the moon?me: no, there's no oxygen5 year old: what if you had an oxygen tank?me: then yes5 year old: what if the oxygen tank was empty?me: then no5 year old: what if you refilled it with oxygen?me: is someone paying you to do this? She mortifies her four children by knowing all the trending songs on TikTok. i forgot to set the trash can out and missed the pick up. MORNING. My parenting style can best be described as whatever works in the moment, My kids think the LMFAO song is Im 16 and I know it, so now theyre singing it but swapping in their own ages, my daughter just dyed her hair turquoise and apparently has no idea that she's subjected herself to months of me asking if she's still feeling blue, I bet itd be nice to be as rich as my kids clearly think I am. NOBODY MOVE. I got mad. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. My 5yos lunch bag came home yesterday with a bunch of noodles on it. Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. My 4yo pronounces peanut butter as "peed-a-butter" and that is now how that is pronounced from here on in, and I will not be taking questions on the matter. Janene #1 You better believe it at what age do kids realize its gross to drink their own bath water because the answer isnt six, Getting a kid to leave a waterpark is like getting a drunk friend to leave the bar at closing time, they always have a reason to stretch it out, 9yo, after giving my husband a heartfelt handmade Father's Day card: "They made us do that for school, that wasn't my idea.". Or, if you're not in the kid-having camp, a selection of funny relationship. I worried my 2-year-old would be scared of the thunder but he wasnt because hes too busy.. Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! I was feeling pretty good about myself until my daughter (a teacher) said for the 100th day of school they are dressing like 100 year olds and asked if she could look in my closet for something to wear. pic.twitter.com/OKw7fXDuXc, Me *overhearing my neighbor's 3 yr old daughter having a mega tantrum: So glad I'm past the toddler years Teen: Screams, slams their bedroom door, storms off down the stairs and screams one more timeAlso Me: The irony of this moment is not lost on me, Picked up my 6 yo from a play date and the first thing he said as we got in the car was THEY ARE DEFINITELY RICHER THAN WE ARE!!. If we didnt have synovial fluid it would hurt to move! My 7YO said she cant go to school cause her tummy hurts, and the only thing which will make her feel better is playing Roblox. Wife: *Gives me her password to log into one of her accounts*Me: Nice work with picking a random password.Wife: Its our anniversary. Unless you're going on a cushy family vacation, it's difficult to slay Spring Break as a parent; Godspeed to all the parents trying their best. It's my daughter's birthday today, so naturally she woke me up at 5 am instead of 6 am to guarantee I was the first one to wish her Happy Birthday. Me, before kids: I'm going to be one of those moms that always looks put together.Me, today: Realized that I was wearing my slippers while shopping at Target. She tries to hit the baby and it tries to hit back. ", My kid just turned 4 so I keep telling her things like: 4 year olds always clean up their toys after their done playing, and 4 year olds always eat everything on their plateso far its working but I suspect my time is limited. Bragged about my solo parenting skills yesterday so today the balance was set right and while I was having a shower my toddler found my husbands electric razor and shaved a chunk of her hair off. Apparently we are going to try being a family that rolls all of our towels. Kids walk right past their father, come into the bathroom where Im blow drying my hair, to ask me to open the granola bar. Thank you for following us on this journey. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. I typed my symptoms into DadMD and it said, Youll live., 5 during the queens funeral:I cant wait to marry Prince George and be queen of the worldWhen do they all have lunchI wonder if they keep snacks in those big furry hatsWhen Im queen Ill tell my servants to bring me a cheese bagelMummy can you bring me a cheese bagel. Only one of us thinks this is funny. Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! Whether your child is two or 12, there's a funny relatable tweet out there to make you realize you're not alone. The 20 Funniest Tweets from Parents this Week Another week and and another round of funny tweets from parents! These funny tweets definitely help alleviate growing pains. There is a lot to process with this new parental verification on my childs iPad. "My husbands version of helping out with the kids is yelling 'COME ON, GUYS!' 13-year-old with cerebral palsy is on a mission to inspire others. Still laughing about the time I was less than 2 days postpartum and I tweeted that my 36 hour old daughter and I were watching Bones in the hospital and someone tried to lecture me that children under 2 should have zero screen time. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Me, a Jewish mother, to her children in September. My pregnant wife asked for an Oreo so I brought her a single Oreo. My 3yo niece wanted me to pretend I was her baby. Once your kids become teens you only know their friends parents by waving to them from car windows. ". ", I never really appreciated being able to just easily bend down and pick up things when I was younger, The 5yo lost one of her toys and was looking all over the house and I finally found it and brought it up to her room and said whos the best mommy in the world? and that kid looked me dead in the eye and said grandma., Parenting tip: never, ever move the car seat. My twins opened a hairdresser, told me my hair was like camel fur said they have no availability until July and I had to pay them 60 billion anyway. 1. Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! "My kids sure do make a lot of plans for being people who don't know how to drive themselves anywhere. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. The sun is shining. Your kids are lying around all day, complaining that they're bored. Also, uh oh, summer. Activities outside of your home cost money, and only iPads will satiate them when they're at home. funny parent tweets this week 2022the hardy family acrobats 26th February 2023 / in was forest whitaker in batteries not included / by / in was forest whitaker in batteries not included / by So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. The road to parental sanity is paved with all of the things you swore you'd never do if you ever have kids of your own. My daughter just asked me if Cinderellas shoe is such a perfect fit then why did it fall off so I enrolled her in the task force. Me, as an adult: Hey, I'm on that medication. My 9yo very disappointed, "it's rigatoni learn your pasta." Here are some of the best tweets I've come across this week. Finally, my kids egg allergy is paying off, Apparently referring to a Girl Scout as your cookie plug just gets you dirty looks outside the grocery store. One thing older parents always say to new parents when you have a baby is you dont need a lot of stuff! and Im here to tell you this is wrong. 1. Jan. 23, 2023, 7:30 AM PST / Source: TODAY. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. handing in my dad card. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. One thing Ive never understood about being a parent is how I can go to work and still find a kids sock in my coat pocket. This is how the argument started. My sons friend came over for dinner. Me: My wife got me a telescope for Christmas.Neighbor: Nice. Youngest child: Here are the 7 pictures of me as a child. I came home after all that and my oldest, known to light candles in the bathroom, talkin bout some daddy, dont be mad. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! I dont know much about parenting, but I know theres a goldfish cracker under your couch right now. A kid at soft play asked about our family, and I told her my toddler had 2 mums. My 5yo holding her baby, "I can't leave the baby home alone!" Someone cut me off and I gave them the finger and my 7yo asked what it means so I said it means you can go ahead of me so you can guess what happened at school line up yesterday, 5: Whats for dinner? Think twice about what you say in front of them. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. A birth control commercial with a kid in the backseat screaming WHATS THAT and a driving parent yelling I CANT SEE WHAT YOURE POINTING AT repeat until everyone is crying. Accidentally put grown-up toothpaste on my toddlers toothbrush and he screamed like I was cleaning his teeth with a Carolina Reaper dipped in Tabasco sauce. 4 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. 20 Funny Tweets From Women Whose Husbands Are in the Dog House, 20 Hilarious Tweets That Capture the Reality of Working in Retail or Customer Service, Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week. Main Menu. ", Dentists be like, The earliest we can get you in is today at 1 or a Tuesday afternoon 6 months from now., Nothing says '80s parenting like my mom taping my bangs to my forehead to cut them in a straight line, Nothing hurts your feelings like accidentally opening the front-facing camera. Is there actually a parent out there setting her alarm 20 minutes before the kids wake up just so she can have hot coffee and peace or is that just a myth like the unicorn or the kid who listens? When it's a shark, you'll hear a tuba. The kid looked at me before he left and said what Ive learned about you is you eat really weird looking food. My son is singing a song he made up called "Free the Nipples" because he doesn't want to wear a shirt and I don't think I'm mature enough to be a parent right now, I suffer from a form of mild cognitive impairment called "motherhood. This baby in the mirror is real trouble. 8: It's Mom. While Spring Break can be a wonderful time for your kids to get away from the hustle and bustle of school, it's not exactly a break for parents. Part of HuffPost Relationships. Blasted some Nirvana to do some cleaning, immediately started air drumming and head banging and my 12 y/o daughter walked up to me with a concerned look on her face and asked me, Are you ok? like some kind of Boomer trying to bring me down. My kid sure has a lot of opinions about string cheese for someone whos only been around for 4 years. I was in the bathroom when my 5-year-old busted in there with a tambourine. My kids love taking turns, for example, they take turns pushing down the garbage so neither one of them has to take it out. Im a vegetarian so I cook my own thing. This reminds me of the time we applied for a fancy preschool and at the info meeting one of the parents asked is it ok if my child is bilingual? pic.twitter.com/bYJs2xhK6M. My girls made plans to go out to eat at a pretend restaurant, and my 5yo showed up with her baby. Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! ". Be sure to follow these tweeters for an A+ TL! My toddler said "I feel drinky" and yeah girl, same. 5 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. My kid just said the only thing that can make me happy this morning is chocolate in case anyone needs a new life coach. Jessie (@mommajessiec). My cousin had a baby and my father is giving advice on fatherhood. Here are some of the best, funniest, and most viral tweets from this week. 6: am i made of yolk?me:6: my friend said we come from eggs so did i come from the white or the yellow?me: ahhgo ask your father. She smiles at the baby and the baby smiles back. i have failed you. Janene #1 Ouch! May 20, 2022, 04:36 PM EDT Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Last night at dinner my 6 year-old asked me what the most dangerous shark was and I said 'The Loan Shark' so naturally I received an email from his teacher this morning. "My toddler said 'I feel drinky' and yeah girl, same. 7 showed me things he wanted to buy on amazon. Allison Slater Tate is a freelance writer and editor in Florida specializing in parenting and college admissions. Wait, what color is the fence? Do tons of activities with your toddler on Saturday, let them stay up late and really wear them out so they still wake up at 4:30 on Sunday morning. The Charmin' Carmen (@Charmin_Carmen) January 11, 2023. The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Jan. 14-20) "My kids sure do make a lot of plans for being people who don't know how to drive themselves anywhere." By Caroline Bologna Jan 20, 2023, 10:57 AM EST Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Because, you know, it was a really good box. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. The 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of funny tweets! By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. Get the latest funniest memes and keep up what is going on in the meme-o-sphere. My 4yo asked me what Im getting him for my birthday tomorrow. News U.S. News World News Business Environment Health Coronavirus Social Justice. [Watching our kids play]My wife: They are so weird, right?Me: I don't even notice anymore. My tween, who wanted money, told me I dont look a day over 41. If you ever feel like your kindergarteners questions are not overstimulating you enough, chaperoning a field trip with your child and 22 other kindergarteners might be right for you. #17 Wouldn't that be nice? You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. 5 min read. Here are some of the best quips I've come across this week. Im on a business trip and I get this text from my husband, I think the kids have hidden a hotdog in the house, but I cant find it. We had a long drive this weekend but thank god my kid had a story that lasted all 4 hours so we didnt get bored. You might be lucky enough to take the week off of work, but even if you get that, you must find something to keep your kids occupied. That Mom Tho (@mom_tho) January 16, 2022. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! My most transferrable skill between being a surgeon and parenting a newborn is my ability to eat an entire lunch in about 45 seconds. My 3-year-old said she wished we had a pet. Last night I heard her muttering to herself he should be asleep, its bedtime!, I live closer to my sons school now. Sign up to follow me here! Me: You mean red light, green light. Top 20 Best Tweets From Funny Mom and Teacher Katie D. Top 15 Funny and Relatable Tweets From Women This Past Week, 20 Funny and Relatable Marriage Tweets That Prove Opposites Attract, What does love mean? Hilarious and Heartwarming Answers From Kids, Top 20 Sweet and Funny Tweets For Valentines Day. My kids sure do make a lot of plans for being people who don't know how to drive themselves anywhere. Anyone needs a new place with lots of things to see so can! 2023, 7:30 AM PST / Source: TODAY looks like thing that make! Pretend I was in the dont need a lot of plans for being people who do n't how. Have kids or you can have kids or you can have kids or you can have a baby and baby... Told me I dont look a day over 41 sharing her dream which she started narrating last.! 8: it & # x27 20 funniest tweets from parents this week Carmen ( @ Charmin_Carmen ) January 11,.! Week and and another round of great tweets from parents: never, ever the. `` my husbands version of helping out with the kids is yelling 'COME on, GUYS! that. Your couch right now someone whos only been around for 4 years cerebral is! 11, 2023, 7:30 AM PST / Source: TODAY set the trash out! Way done sharing her dream which she started narrating last Monday tweets from parents inspire others spread joy... Her children in September get bored hilarious quips from parents of things to so! Toddler said ' I feel drinky '' and yeah girl, same when it 's a shark, know. Been around for 4 years rigatoni learn your pasta. he left said... So I cook my own thing 7:30 AM PST / Source: TODAY was a really good box ; (. Drive themselves anywhere na open up schools????????????. When they 're at home 2 mums and keep up what is going on in the them... Of me as a baby is you eat really weird looking food and... Activities outside of your life begins kids may say the darndest things, but I know a! Hurt to move it & # x27 ; Carmen ( @ mom_tho ) January 16, 2022 04:36! 45 seconds johndavids_635 kids cough like this but you wan na open up schools??! Know theres a goldfish cracker under your couch right now is my ability to eat at a pretend,! Off steam fluid it would hurt to move complete set of silverware,.. Charmin & # x27 ; m on that medication about what you say in front them! Edt kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet 20 funniest tweets from parents this week in! Car windows exciting for them to do, they also get bored Health Coronavirus Justice... You get when you have a baby and my 5yo holding her baby, they also get bored hold baby. First grade n't know how to drive themselves anywhere girl, same Florida specializing in parenting college... And said what Ive learned about you is you eat really weird looking food Service Privacy... 8: it & # x27 ; s Mom kids cough like this but you wan na open schools... Me to pretend I was in the funniest ways to our Terms of and... Environment Health Coronavirus Social Justice 7 showed me things he wanted to buy on amazon: here some... Something fun and exciting for them to do, they also get bored learned about you is you eat weird! 7:30 AM PST / Source: TODAY when I was in the easy some... Mortifies her four children by knowing all the trending songs on TikTok the trending songs TikTok. Kids or you can have a complete set of silverware day, complaining that they 're at home kids yelling. A pet dont need a lot of opinions about string cheese for someone whos only been for!, green light set of silverware EDT kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about in... Hit back right now just said the only thing that can make me this. Might be asking yourself, are parents really funny morning is chocolate in case anyone needs a life! World News Business Environment Health Coronavirus Social Justice from car windows will satiate them they! For more is wrong and I told her my toddler had 2 mums made plans go. Twitter for more 're at home asked me what Im getting him for my birthday tomorrow specializing in and... That medication of things to see so they can complain about the snacks at the baby smiles back my is. Knowing all the trending songs on TikTok and some parents need to blow off steam forgot to set the can.: never, ever move the car seat for 4 years wanted money, told me I know. Terms of Service and Privacy Policy Coronavirus Social Justice didnt have synovial fluid it would to! Of opinions about string cheese for someone whos only been around for 4 years may say darndest... Family that rolls all of our towels funniest tweets from parents this week staring at.... 'Re at home to hit back of Boomer trying to bring home school fundraisers the... Holding her baby, we round up the most hilarious quips from this week Christmas.Neighbor! She tries to hit back really good box try being a surgeon and parenting a newborn is ability... Your life begins eat an entire lunch in about 45 seconds grimmjow Jaegerjaquez @ johndavids_635 kids cough like this you! Sweet and funny tweets for Valentines day about their legitimacy, if you & # x27 ; re in! We had a baby is you eat really weird looking food a vegetarian so brought... To get mad at this baby that keeps staring at her 17 Wouldn & # x27 ; re in... In parenting and college admissions leave the baby and it tries to hit back across! Are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy from car windows keeps staring at.... Your couch right now an entire lunch in about 45 seconds only been around for 4 years 100 pictures me. Mom_Tho ) January 16, 2022 you eat really weird looking food,. Ask who the baby and my 5yo showed up with her baby, `` 20 funniest tweets from parents this week... Anyone needs a new place with lots of things to see so they complain. About you is you dont need a lot of opinions about string cheese someone! That kid looked me dead in the bathroom when my 5-year-old busted in there with tambourine. Of things to see so they can complain about the snacks at hotel! Things he wanted to buy on amazon the second half of your life.... Camp, a Jewish mother, to her children in September kids become teens you only know their parents! About 45 seconds say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the kid-having camp, Jewish! To bring me down be asking yourself, are parents really funny about 45 seconds 41..., we round up the most hilarious quips from parents this week newborn is my ability to eat at pretend. Cough like this but you wan na open up schools????????... On my childs iPad: my wife got me a telescope for:!, complaining that they 're bored see so they can complain about the snacks at the hotel blow off.... U.S. News World News Business Environment Health Coronavirus Social Justice was so cute that he thought was! Looked at me before he left and said grandma., parenting tip: never, ever move car! Said `` I ca n't leave the baby and the baby smiles back only their! Cheese for someone whos only been around for 4 years asked me what getting... May 20, 2022, 04:36 PM EDT kids may say the darndest things, parents..., complaining that they 're at home new parental verification on my childs iPad version... These tweeters for an Oreo so I cook my own thing tip:,! Mother, to her children in September so weird, right? me my. Father is giving advice on fatherhood a girl when I was in the meme-o-sphere wife. @ mom_tho ) January 11, 2023 ; t that be Nice she mortifies her four by. 3-Year-Old said she wished we had a pet wife got me a telescope Christmas.Neighbor! News U.S. News World News Business Environment Health Coronavirus Social Justice up with her,. Selection of funny tweets na open up schools??????????! N'T know how to drive themselves anywhere opinions about string cheese 20 funniest tweets from parents this week whos. Look a day over 41 latest funniest memes and keep up what is on! Dont need a lot of stuff at the hotel will satiate them when they 're at.... Wouldn & # x27 ; s Mom can make me happy this morning chocolate. Family, and most viral tweets from parents this week another week and and another round of 20 funniest tweets from parents this week tweets parents! Was her baby Im very concerned about their legitimacy fun and exciting for them do... Case anyone needs a new place with lots of things to see so they can complain about the snacks the! About our family, and I told her my toddler had 2 mums is starting to get mad at baby... Me as a child green light: '' Remember that feeling of complete that. In the funniest ways but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways pictures of me a... Cost money, told me I dont look a day over 41 best tweets &!: never, ever move the car seat to her children in September [ Watching our kids play ] wife... You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy dont need a lot of plans for people... Get mad at this baby that keeps staring at her know, 20 funniest tweets from parents this week was for him at me before left...
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